Wednesday, June 07, 2006


As the wedding draws closer I find myself having to deal more and more with the infamous Bridezilla. Think of it as a child in the middle of a storm, having a tempter tantrum because she can't have a lollipop. One of the methods that I have learned is to walk away, because if there is no audience what's the point? So, if Bridezilla has no audience, who is she going to whine to? If you are being asked to do something unreasonable, say no. You don't want to say no right way, get some space from the emotion of the moment and say, let me consider what your saying I don’t fully understand and then refuse later. Sometimes this will not work and you have to just grin and bear it, when that happens relax and sing a little tune.

With a purposeful grimace and a terrible sound
You can’t get away she is like a blood hound
Around the world helpless men cry
Wondering who is going to be the first to die
She clinches her fist and starts to bob around
You know its over when she knocks you to the ground

Oh no, they say she's got to go
Go go Bridezilla
Oh no, there goes Tokyo
Go go Bridezilla
Oh no, they say she's got to go
Go go Bridezilla,Oh no, there goes Tokyo
Go go Bridezilla

I would also like to thank The Girl Next Door for her tips on How to Throw a Killer Bachelor Party.


Catch said...

OK...who's getting married? You? When you get married what is hers is hers....and what is yours is

TheHamburger said...

This is true, Catch. 'Do you really want one vagina for the rest or your life? Way to think it through...'

Curare_Z said...

Any girl that claims she wasn't bridezilla before her wedding is pretty much lying. I'll admit, I became a bit of a crazed bridezilla before the wedding.

The good news? She'll go back to being the woman your love/hate right after the honeymoon. ;-)

Metal Mark said...

I remember my wife saying that on our wedding day she hardly slept and she spent hours getting herself ready and had all of these people helping her. She was also worried the whole night about everything. On the other hand I slept eight hours that night, got up and ran then watched wrestling and ate pop-tarts before taking about 15 minutes to get ready and going over to the church.

phred said...

You will be assimilated.

:P fuzzbox said...

Resistance is futile. Speaking from experience though stay away from permanent markers the night before.

Crazy Dan said...

Catch - I wear the pants.

Hamburger - I call it Sunshine because if you could throw it in the air it would turn to sunshine.

curare - after the honey moon why not the night of?

Mark - Thats me too bro

Phred - Phucker, I am going to
ass-imalte you

Fuzz - Like green lantern my will is strong.

Phats said...

what are you getting married?!?! Congrats if you are, good luck with bridezilla haha

phred said...

Like Fuzz said... You snooze, you lose.

Then you will be assimilated, color of the markers is of no consequence.

Laurie said...

She must be a woman of infinite patience and understanding if she's marrying you ;-)

Yeah, I liked the girl's bachelor party list, too.

MTs bachelor party was at a private hall with gambling, drinking, and a lesbian floor show.. (I had a mole there, lol) But hey, he had fun, and it was all good with me. I can't wait to hear about yours!

Crazy Dan said...

In respect for my beautiful wifes wishes I will be having no bachelor party. So there will be no stories, pictures, or any kind of wispered stories about any goats, lesbians, keg stands, shot contests, blowjobs, orgies, or girls playing with their own feces.

Curare_Z said...

b/c she'll still be all ga-ga over getting married and will want a play by play of "what were you thinking when I appeared at the end of the aisle," "what did you think of the center pieces..." etc. It takes EXCESSIVE drinking to knock the sense back into any cool woman. Hence, the need for a honey moon. ;-)

Pixie said...

I love the show Bridezilla heh, and no I wasnt one. We just drove the the courthouse did the deed came back home and watched TV LOL.

Faith said...



Oh, and congratulation Dan on the forth coming wedding. I send all my best wishes your way.