What you need:
- Hamburger Meat
- A jalapeño
- Chunks of cheddar cheese
- Pepperidge Farm 5 cheese Texas Toast Garlic Bread. – Found in the frozen Food Section
- Pantera CD
Throw on a little Pantera “Walk” if you have it. You’re going to eat a
Put a little oil in a skillet; turn your burner to medium heat. While that’s getting hot cut up your mushrooms and onions. I like lots of onions and mushrooms. You don’t have to make’em look pretty this is a hearty sandwich. Throw your mushrooms and onions into the skillet. Cut up your jalapeño into small pieces and throw it on a paper plate. You can use I bowl if you like. I’m not doing your dishes. I’ve heard wives do stuff like this, but that may just be a nasty rumor to trick single guys. Throw your cheddar chucks and meat where your jalapeños are. Mix all that shit together with your hands. You did wash your hands didn’t you? Don’t be a nasty fuck, wash your hands! Make yourself a patty. Get crazy on the patty size if you like. Grab some of that bacon and toss it into the microwave, cook until it’s crispy. Slap that patty down in the skillet with the mushrooms and onions. Get out a couple of pieces of that Texas Toast and pop into the toaster. I like my vegetables well done and my meat medium-rare to rare. So cook it to your taste. Keep in mind that if you cook over over medium into well done or medium-well you're burning the shit out of it. This is a Texas sandwich and Texans don't burn their meat. If it's not pink in the middle you're a pansy. I'm sorry I didn't make the rules. Slap all that into a sandwich; you should be able to make a sandwich without instructions. If you’re slow, the meat, onions, and mushrooms go between the bread. Also note the cheese side should be in, pointing towards the meat not your dirty hands.
CRAZY TASTY, and remember.
You can't be something you're not.
Be yourself, by yourself, stay away from me.
A lesson learned in life, known from the dawn of time
Just in case you don't know who Rachael Ray is. Here is a wallpaper.