Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Happy Hoffday!

Yesterday was The Hoff’s Birthday. I didn’t have time to post it, so we will celebrate his birthday today. I am bringing back the 30 facts about the Hoff!

1.David Hasselhoff has slept with your mother and could be your father.

2.David Hasselhoff slept with every lifeguard on Baywatch.

3.David Hasselhoff slept with every lifeguard that worked for your town's pool.

4.There are many dying children out there whose last wish is to meet David Hasselhoff.

5.David Hasselhoff really invented Spandex.

6.David Hasselhoff invented condoms.

7.David Hasselhoff single handedly tore down the Berlin wall.

8.David Hasselhoff mother was a Banshee from Ireland.

9.David Hasselhoff can drink you under the table.

10.David Hasselhoff actually created German Death Metal.

11.David Hasselhoff was kicked out off NASCAR for being to bad ass.

12.David Hasselhoff can get you pregnant by just looking at you.

13.David Hasselhoff can travel back in time.

14.David Hasselhoff is the true "King" of Rock-N-Roll.

15.They based "The Terminator" off David Hasselhoff.

16.Merely touching a David Hasselhoff CD can get you laid by German supermodels.

17.David Hasselhoff voice is considered an aphrodisiac.

18.In Germany instead of history they teach about David Hasselhoff.

19.David Hasselhoff invented Hip Hop.

20.David Hasselhoff started the East Coast, West Coast war.

21.David Hasselhoff is a legend in the underground rap community.

22.David Hasselhoff would have kicked Hitlers ass.

23.David Hasselhoff is Odin's youngest son.

24.David Hasselhoff is not of any one nationality, but belongs to the world.

25.David Hasselhoff was kicked off the Kings of Comedy Tour for being too black.

26.David Hasselhoff was kicked off the Blue Collar Comedy Tour for being too redneck.

27.Harry Potter is really about David Hasselhoff life at school.

28.David Hasselhoff chest hair is actually magical.

29.David Hasselhoff will single handedly bring about world peace.

30. Ladies can’t resist jumping in the Hoff’s car!


:P fuzzbox said...

Long live The Hoff.

Mimi said...

LMFAO! You forgot to mention his recent shaving mishap!

It is amzaing what we think isx cheesey is the shit in other countries. No matter what though Knightrider will always be a kick ass show, in its own way and time at least.

Johnny Wadd said...

Ya know i never "minded" the hoff for the years he has been around, knight rider was cool when i was a kid and the t&a baywatch was great when i became a teen. I even shrugged off his "musical career" but it does seem like the last year he has really turned up the obnoxious level to the point where i'm wondering what kind of coke he's on and where do i get some.