Saturday, July 30, 2005

Sandals Of Peace: Part 1


I am happy to announce that I have located the sandals of peace but have yet to attain them. The sandals of peace will bring an inner peace and sense of readiness that I must have to continue my journey. Without the calmness of the body and soul there is no way that one can withstand the fires that await.
My journey for the sandals brought me to a place most men desire to be above all things else. The sandals are being guarded by that oldest profession that has lain hidden threw out the ages. Although such business's appear perfectly harmless there is much peril when going to these establishments as the drink and moral depravity makes most men lose their sanity and think only of wanting the simple pleasure in life. The temptress's guarding the sandals have done so for a millennium and are skilled at making most abandon their search and only think of their carnal desires.
My first attempt at retrieving the sandals I must say was a disaster I was plagued by comrades boating that the only way to beat these dark creatures and capture the sandals was to out drink them and prove that we could take as many dances as they could give. It was a cruel fate that awaited me that night for the creatures appeared to have a limitless tolerance for the drinks of man. My comrades and I were forced to leave penniless and it seemed a great illness overcame us for after leaving my stomach was empted on several occasions and that certain part of body had turned a strange color of blue and I vowed never to do that again. I must reach this goal on my own for it seems that when together these vile creatures feed off of us easier. Alone is the only way that I can reach the sandals but how can I hope to tame the three serpents without help, it seems quite impossible. So I am reaching out there to a small but intelligent group of web browsers for suggestions on how to defeat the three eager whores.

6 comments:

Big D said...

I am sorry that a failed you my brother. The serpent whores were far superior then we had imagined. Their cunning knows no bounds and tolerance no limits.We went cocky and headstrong into the shadows thinking we could take on anyone, but alas the attempt proved disastrous. When the sickness overcame me that morning I will admit I too felt all hope was lost for recovery. As I bowed humbly before the throne the idea was like a bolt of lightening. This is how we must proceed. Yes, your compatriots are not yet finished with guiding on this most great quest. To gain the sandals of peace we must appear before the serpent women humbly for the power is too immense and trying to steal is unattainable and there for they must grant you a gift of the Sandals of Peace. That is the only way to attain your first objective. Perilous it may be, but the few and the strong will stand beside you.

:P fuzzbox said...

F*** the sandels of peace, I will settle for the flip-flops of depravity and the undergarments of desire worn by the keepers and be content.

Anonymous said...

In the words of our leader Tom Cruise Respect the Cock Tame the Cunt. Poor fuzzbox must be a pussy whipped som of a bitch. Great blog

Anonymous said...

Dan,
I feel your pain... I have fallen under the spell of drink myself....I do not remember what I was searching for.... I too have taken the oath of sobrity .
I can only guess as to the answer to you delima with the three whores...
I would imagine your best option would be to ''SATISFY'' them. Good Luck.
Fuzzbox ???? I would have known it was you even if you did not sign your comment.

:P fuzzbox said...

Anonymous must be a cock slapped, pink side of life, ass licking freind of Liberace. I can think of no other reason for his comment. My advice to him would be to go ahead with his gender reassignment and stop besmirching the name of true men. That and learn how to spell.

Martini said...

A wise man once went on a faraway journey that took many years. As he traveled he stopped in each village visiting such places of which you speak. He too had experiences such as you and Big D have described, only to learn the tricks of the serpent women and avoid the fiery clap....I mean trap. Upon reaching a eerie part of the land named Sin City was he able to harness the energy he had learned from the trip and bring one of these serpent women to her knees. The moral of this story.....the journey is long but the reward is sweet upon victory.
Yours is only a chapter on a novel you are writing. All Hail the Sin City!