Friday, September 30, 2005

Breaking News from oysterderby

Maxson over at Oysterderby has alerted us to photos of Anne Hathaway naked. Cheers in the streets were later heard while I pondered who stole my video. Here is a couple of Wallpapers to celebrate. Check out Oysterderby for the pics of her nude. i also updated the WTR wallpaper to our current girl Next Door Niki and the two desktops below.

Friday's Naughty School Girl

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Impossible Odds

A flash from his battle axe lighted the cavern as :PFuzzbox picked himself up off the floor. Clutching his axe at his side, his other hand opening and closing in rage the image of Crazy Dan being brutalized, subjected to the Brainkin's tortures flashes through his mind. CrazyDan had been the one that had given him hope, he could not let this be the end. "Where is your partner, at least he had more meat on his bones" laughed the creature taunting the small dwarf. "Creature, listen good don't toy with me like some scrawny, pathetic little girl that has never been trained in the art of war."
At this the two combatants went after each other knowing that this would be a battle to the blood. During the first few blows :PFuzzbox decided he had better concentrate more on defense. The guardian was quick as well as powerfull he had only narrowly excaped death twice. The days events had already worn him down and even with the battle lust upon him the guardian had managed to get his claws on him creating a deep gash that ran all the way down his right leg causing blood to gush out upon the cavern floor. With his leg injured he would not have the speed to escape the creatures punishing blows for long it was only a matter of time.He had to find an opening and soon only a few hours remained until they notcied he was gone.
Finally seeing an opening the dwarf moved with his last bit of energy in an attempt to cleave the creatures belly open, but the ground was slippery with blood and he crashed to the ground. The Guardian kneeled over the fallen dwarf and smiled with its crooked teeth and pointed her claws to his throat. With a painful groan he realized it was retrieve the helmet or die, there was no middle ground.
He then closed his fist and hit the creature it was a killing blow to the throat. The Guardian gurgled and arched like a woman in orgasm and went limp. The creatures eyes were glazed over with a look of surprise grimaced in pain. :PFuzzbox slowly got up limped to the helmet and exclaimed "This thing better come with a blowjob."

Thursday's Naughty School Girl

Wednesday, September 28, 2005


So I took off the shoutbox and added the sitemeter counter back on. Damn popups just got to annoying. Also, I added a new link to Lap Dancing fan. Pretty good stuff check it out. If you link to me and I haven't returned the favor let me know.

Edit: Made some other changes which you can probably tell. No friends at the top just links on the side. This will eliminate some picture files and make you load quicker. "That's what she said" for those of you who watch the Office. Updated WTR wallpaper to our current girls. The blog looks a little plain right now to me. So more updates may be coming.

Wednesday's Naughty School Girls

Remember those little pops stars Tatu from Russia? No, not there music How they dressed as schoolgirls and tongues each other all the time. That's right number one record baby.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Crazy Tasty!

So what does the title have to do with this post? Absolutely nothing.

So I'm going to try this new little add on Blogger created that allows you to post from Word. Which shoul be pretty sweet. No more having to go back an edit all the apostrophes and other special characters. I'm still going to use html for my pictures I think, depends on how easy it is. Here is hoping it works. Guess what, that didn't work for shit! I guess it's back to editing in notpad.

I learned today while on Fark about the FBI forming a new department I thought it was a joke but apparently not it's also on the Washington Post... Well I guess it could still be a joke. The department code named on Fark as the "Porn Squad" or the Adult Anti-Obscenity Squad as it's called in the FBI will divert eight agents, a supervisor and assorted support staff to gather evidence against "manufacturers and purveyors" of pornography -- not the kind exploiting children, but the kind that depicts, and is marketed to, consenting adults. Agents for the porn squad should have a stomach for the kind of material that tends to be most offensive to local juries, community standards -- along with a lustful purpose and absence of artistic merit or pretty much anything on my hard drive. Congress began funding the obscenity initiative in fiscal 2005 and specified that the FBI must devote 10 agents to adult pornography. Yes, it looks like we have won the war on terror. Now the war on porn begins. I have chosen sides and will fight on the side of Justice, Chastity, and Jenna.

Damn those tricky stick shifts! A would be car tracker was thwarted after he ordered a 26-year-old man out of his Chevrolet Camaro in a suburban Kansas City parking lot. The driver complied, but when the robber got into the car he was unable to manage the stick shift. The car jacker apparently reads this blog and had a friend with a getaway car to help him flee the scene. I did not mention the fact that if you are going to steal something you need to be able to operate it. Live and learn.

Here is yet another liberal northerner out of touch with moral values and trying to push off her views in the heartland of America. Heartland of America? Well in this case Iowa. Yes a new law professor that relocated to Iowa University from Boston is challenging the school to the NCAA saying the pink painted visitors locker-room is quote "deeply offensive and completely unacceptable". She claims the locker room color promotes sexism and homophobia. Never mind the fact that she has never been in the locker room or to a football game. We wouldn't want the visiting gay football stars offended. I think it's absolutely hilarious and this mind fuck is genius. The pink locker room goes back to the days of former Iowa coach Hayden Fry, and has been expanded in the current renovation of the stadium -- including the carpeting, metal lockers, brick walls, sinks, and shower floor -- even the urinals. The law professor is now getting well deserved death threats. She should have realized how seriously football is taken by regular people and shut her liberal ass-mouth up.

Tuesday's Naughty School Girl

Monday, September 26, 2005

Monday's Naughty School Girl

I've been getting alot of pressure to have a theme of chicks with guns, but frankly women with weaons frighten me. It's unnatural and unamerican. So if you want to check out chicks with guns or knifes I suggest a trip to your favorite search engine and type in"action girls". There will be many free galleries of hot pornstars with guns and military gear. Yank it till it's raw if you want. With that settled I thought I'd start October themes early. These week is Naughty School Girls.

Friday, September 23, 2005

GOTD: Hilarie Burton

From One Trill Hill which I've never seen a full show, but would totally smack that ass on Hilarie Burton. You know she likes it rough.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

The Shit gets Deep

His battle axe dripping ;PFuzzbox looked on helpless as the swirling vortex over took his partner, with a great sadness he knew that there was nothing that could be done he would have to say a silent pray to the Lady of Battles and hope that CrazyDan could weather the storm. Anger consumed him as he continued deeper into the Cave of Disturbed more and more foul creatures began to surface overwhelming him. He knew time was running short and there was no possible way he could dispatch all of the Brainkin's Minions and retrieve the Metal Gods Helmet of Salvation. It was too much to bear he could not fail, he would not fail, CrazyDan must be avenged and nothing would stop him from his mission. It was then that a light began to permeate all around him his heartbeat slowed and a new energy revitalized him giving him power that strength beyond that of normal dwarfs he even seemed to grow taller. After all his adventures it had finally happened the legendary battle lust of his clan had overtaken him. With a howl that made the creatures of the night piss their panties ;PFuzzbox began effortlessly hacking a path deeper into the cave searching franticly for the Helmet. It did not take him long to find the resting-place of the helmet only a few more yards and it would be his. Rushing to the helmet and blinded him and the guardian of the helmet crashed into him causing ;PFuzzbox to fly into the wall. "What the FUCK!" screamed the pissed of dwarf. High above sprawling dwarf the guardian looked down and laughed. "Go home little midget before I decide to make you my pet."

GOTD: Allison Mack

Some may say this girl is not hot, but I'll show Allison Mack from Smallville a super time anytime. I'm allowed my lame ass comments sometimes!

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Hookers and Football and Drill Teams, OH MY!

The place to be is Detroit. That's right I said Detroit home to Kid Rock and Slim Shady this town is booming with a new influx of high class hookers. That's right these ladies are out for some easy money and a quick lay. The police have nicknamed them "Hollywood Hookers" because they dress glitzier, look hotter, and charge more. Must be a hard job working the hooker beat! The officers also say these prostitutes are smarter and less likely on drugs. With major events like the All Star Game and the Super bowl coming up these ladies of the night know where the money is and it's not in my wallet. Damn!

There is a place in football where anything goes, where players spit, punch, kick and inflict immense pain with little fear of repercussions. I'm talking about the dog pile where revenge and survival are the norm. Those who wind up in the dog pile must be prepared to hear disturbing sounds and be prepared for horrific scenes. In the pile your manhood is tested with eye-gouging, slapping, spitting, swallowing and maybe a little tickling of the anus and these are only the rumors from Jeff Garcia's dog piles.

Bring it On 3: This shit just gets nasty!In Wichita Kansas it's been broughten. That's right Bee-Otch, I said broughten! When the Dynamic Steppers drill team was challenged at their practice by the White Tigers drill team you knew it was on. As the White Tiger tried to keep their head up they knew it was a lost cause, but that doesn't mean you can't keep it real. As the frustration hit, a drummer from the White tigers viscously threw their drumstick at a drummer on the Stepper team. As the drumstick bounced of the Steppers face the dance-off turned into a brawl like never seen before in Driller history. Like any good brawl the second attack came as a punch to the face as one of Dynamic's struck a tiger. Knowing he might be outmatched the stepper then grabbed the keys to his SUV and attempted to run over some tigers while the Steppers coach, grabbed a box cutter and sliced another woman's right arm, a cut that lacerated 8 inches of muscle. Police later arrived to break up the may lay and escorted 50 people to finer lodgings. Just goes to show, where there is sexy routines there is violence and where there is violence, there's Kirsten Dunst!

West Texas Rocks is still backing Hogan in '08. Here is a pic of Hogan on the campaign trail.

GOTD:Kaley Cuoco

Former star of 8 Simple Rules now on Charmed.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

A Real Post, maybe not real funny.

Kate Moss loves drug fuelled three-in-a-bed lesbian sex sessions especially with her best friends Sadie Frost and Davinia Taylor. The model reportedly becomes wildly sexual during cocaine-fuelled parties, and has orchestrated a number of lesbian romps and a few three ways with Jude Law. That tiny peckered fucker has all the luck. Well maybe not, it's really not that hard to score with nannies and crack whores. Anyone want Lindsays number she really starting to annoy me?

More information then you needed. Morgan Freeman costars report he wears thongs.

Don't lie, you know you want Morgan freeman's goods!

Finally something useful is being down with the nation's schools. In Muncie, Indiana the abandon school was turned into a swingers club, one of only seven in the state. The new club features pool tables, a dance floor, a six-person hot tub, a multiple-person shower and sensually designed theme rooms. Klub Layden the name of the swinger hideout is now being sued by religious leaders worried about our kids. Mary Neal who rents a house across the street says "I thought it was empty, to tell you the truth", but now she is also worried about the kids, even though she has never seen any activity herself.

Some Evacuees Spend Relief Money at Houston Strip Clubs. Well isn't it relief money? What gives you more relief then a nice ass grinding against your crotch and a pair of fake tits bouncing off your face? Maybe I should have donated more strip clubs are expensive.

Click the above pic for other crazy looter photos.

GOTD: Jennifer Esposito

Monday, September 19, 2005

Alba and a Question

I feel kind of bad with the lack of updates lately, but with the last lightening storm the area had I've been crazy busy, both at work and at home with people calling for assistance. It's a lot quicker and easier to build a desktop wallpaper then it is to scourge the net for odd and weird news. So here is a tasty wallpaper of Jessica Alba in a bikini. Sometimes you just can't hate those paparazzi.

Also I have to be a little nerdy today, but I have faith that the people who read this blog that they can get this question right.

A computer is brought in and the customer is experiencing internet trouble. With the computer the customer brings in a piece of software called GhostSurf.

Here is what GhostSurf claims to do.
Surf Anonymously
Remove Spyware
Block Ads and Popups
Prevent Identity Theft
Erase Your Tracks

Now this piece of software should allow you to answer these questions.
What is wrong with the computer?
What caused the issue?
What web surfing habits does this customer have?

Let me know your answers. I know you can do it.

GOTD: Alyssa Milano

I've had this themes backgrounds for a while and it's time I finally used them. I started them back when I Kristin Kreuk was GOTD. With the fall TV lineup about to hit and October coming up I thought if I were going to use it, then it would need to be this week. So "Girls of the WB" is the theme for GOTD this week. I don't watch all the shows these girls are on, but they can make me pause while channel surfing.

Friday, September 16, 2005


Crazy Dan has been taking the slack up for me as I redesigned his site. I know I'm not a professional animator by any means, but I thought the site turned out well. Pay Crazy Dan a visit by clicking on the banner.

Drinking Song War

It seems like myself and :PFuzzbox have gotten ourselves into an old school drinking song contest. So here is my come back to his Irish Drinking Song I present my take to the classics of the Crash Test Dummies.
I can’t tell you how many times me and the group have been asked to perform encores of this song at Bennigan’s and although I admit his song may be cooler then mine for mine doesn't have any dirty word it is just a simple melody of a guy that gets stripers to shave his back. My pictures says a thousand words sometimes its hard to say I love you. And the simple truth that can found in this song makes a man want to weep for its so hard to find a good woman or striper that will shave your back. Its only a portion of the song so I hope you enjoy.

When you go out to strip clubs you're stuck right out bonerville
Unable to touch the whores is just a crying shame
Using dollar bills see some action

She love to shave my body
Leftover parts from apes and monkeys
Your balls and cock show you're wild beast
You can hear their noises at night time
They don't have to keep a certain bedtime
She love to shave my body
Leftover parts from apes and monkeys

GOTD: Sandra E

Last day of Swede week. Hope you enjoyed it. Will I continue around the world or fall into the new fall shows? Only Monday knows.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Evolution of Dog and Man

As I was headed back to work today when I noticed two dogs stuck together. I always thought this was funny but for some reason I didn't stop and throw rocks at the poor creatures like usual. I love watching them running in opposite directions there is just something so funny about that. Instead this time I got to thinking about evolution and how the male dogs penis gets knotted up so that the female cannot run away until the male has finished ejaculating in her. (do dogs ejaculate.) I thought that was a pretty cool way to make sure that their species continues to reproduce. And that lead me to thinking about humans and why we have opposable thumbs and maybe the reason the male has more upper body strength then the female is that that he can hold her down easier and she can not get away until after he had finished with her. I think its pretty strange that all these ideas came to me while watching two dogs fuck and get stuck together. I guess genius works in mysterious ways does anyone else have any ideas on this.

GOTD: Charlotte Rundqvist

On the right, under "other links" is a link to the new thumbnail gallery of all the past GOTD. The few that have been reading from the beginning can look back at your favorites or see a few new wallpapers, while others can see past GOTD's for the first time. WTR Wallpapers

Wednesday, September 14, 2005


I felt a hard slap on my back as :PFuzzbox hit me indicating that it was time to explore the cave more thoroughly. I was wondering if this was a wise idea seeing as how I had just been marked by the devilish Brainkin herself, but the Dwarf did not seemed fazed by this and told me to remember the plan. First, find the fountain in the cave for it is a way to dull the wits and see through their treachery. The search was becoming tiring and the Dwarf getting aggitated stopped us for a break and told the Angry Joyce to move her ass and find the fountain. :PFuzzbox is one crazy ass dwarf talking to a demon like that, but after a few minutes of ducking and dodging spouts of fire he was able to get her to do his bidding and I was amazed at how she finally succumbed to the battle axe and it seemed in the end this was a smart move for she found it quickly. The fountain's brew was able to calm even the Angry Joyce for she arrived back at our camp with tankards full of the sweet nectar. Things were going to get interesting now for as she arrived so did the Brainkin and her minions. Before, they could mount an attack I smiled an uneasy smile and offered the demons something to drink. It seemed that they were caught off guard by my generousity and by the Demon Angry Joyce and her Spawn, they thought myself and :PFuzzbox had been captured for the Angry Joyce. As a high ranking demon it could only make sense because surely a mere dwarf could not subdue someone of her ferocity. The Dwarf knew his plan was working so we slipped out of the camp while the Brainkin and her minions were distracted. We did not have much time so we went to work immediatly by joining the melee in the cave and at his suggestion we separated and began our search for the Metal God's Helmet of Salvation. The plan was working to perfection he was right these serpents were only younglings and with the help of my large one eyed snake I claimed many victories over the serpents. As they moaned their defeat I began to get over confident and careless. I could not help myself it was so easy to claim the serpents orbs as mine. This mistake would be what costed me the most that night for when I looked up I saw that the younglings had banded together and sent a circle pit to destroy me. However, before the pit envolped me I looked to see :PFuzzbox. My comrade was too far away to help me and as we met eyes his battle axe gleaming from his conquests I signaled him to forget about me and find the Helmet. He was reluctant for he was an honorable little Dwarf, but knew it was the only way to retrive the Metal God's Hemet of Salvation for time was running short we had to get back to camp or all would be lost.

GOTD: Helene Rask

Work out your hump day with Helene Rask.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Buddha, Thieves, and Stupid Asian Women

Sure potatoes are fun, but Idaho is (insert lame ass potato related comment) for Buddha! That's right Idahoans (?) are finding inner piece by purchasing Buddha statues out of the back of a flatbed trailer. Why a flatbed trailer? Where else are you going to haul a 500lb man?

In New York Tiffany Wang and Jing Huang or suing Dr Khaled Zeitoun, whom they met on an Internet dating site, for pretending to be single and using mind games to entice them into sexual relationships with tales of past lives. Wait a second let's dissect this sentence.

  • The women's names are Wang and Huang.
  • He used tales of past lives to score.

Way to go Kaled Zeitron who may have found the two stupidest Asian women in New York.

Terry Bearpark of the UK heard screams and immediately went to help his elderly neighbor who was being attacked by two men. Both men turned around and stared to attack where he then hit Heath Randall in the face with a shovel. The other man fled the scene after seeing his unconscious compatriot lying on the ground like a heap of dog shit. During the robber's trial the Judge commended Mr. Bearpark, but added "I wish you'd hit him harder".

GOTD: Janna Svensson

Monday, September 12, 2005

It's a good Monday, so far!

Former Monday Night sideline reporter Lisa Guerrero is posing nude for playboy. Finally a sports reporter with credibility!

Almost 1,500 men and women have stripped naked in the name of art in the French city of Lyon. This free standing fish and sausage festival must have been quite the scene with every Tom, Dick, and hairy woman in attendance.

What's that Mrs. Simpson you want me to take advantage of you?

What's that Ms. Silverton you want me to take advantage of you?

The sweet images of celebrity drunkeness!

I read today that a Police Academy 8 is now in the works. All the original characters are back! Upon reading this, these questions and thoughts came to mind.

  • There was a 6 and 7?
  • Why?
  • Didn't I see that midget lady with the annoying voice in a porno?
  • Steve Guttenberg is still alive?
  • Wasn't Steve Guttenberg dating one of the Olsen twins 8 years ago?
  • How many lines of coke did Steve Guttenberg snort when he finally realized he was a douchebag?
  • I thought we flushed the toilet that was Bobcat Goldthwaite's comedic career?
  • How did Bobcat Goldthwaite score Nikki Cox?
  • I wonder if Nikki Cox is ever going to pose for Playboy.
  • Have you ever noticed Nikki Cox without looking at her enormous breast and ample cleavage? Yeah, me neither.
  • You know what's great about Nikki Cox? Her boobs.
  • I wonder when Nikki Cox is going to lift that restraining order.

Anyway, I may have gotten distracted toward then end, but those were the questions and thoughts that went thru my head.

GOTD: Victoria Silvstedt

Last week was Brazilian week. This week West Tease Rocks is being invaded by Swedes. All I have to is I surrender and thank you Victoria Silvstedt.

Friday, September 09, 2005


It's hard to believe this blog has had 10,000 hits. I've meet some fucktards, bitches and pervs. Here's to the to the first 10,000 and on to the next 10,000!

Another slow day.

I must bring this blog to your attention. because you regular readers are interested in finer things in life, you will enjoy the ramblings of this man, I believe he is a pioneer. I liked the naughty school girl post check it ou at Strip City .

Kevin Smith the almighty god of dick and fart jokes is doing a charity auction to benefit the victims of Katrina. If only I had the money for the BBQ at Kevin Smith's house or the walk on role in Clerks 2: Passion of the Clerks. How sweet would that be! Check it out at View Askew, Snoogans!

  • Barbecue at Kev's House!
  • A Walk-On part in "Clerks 2: Passion of the clerks"
  • "Clerks 2" Set visit
  • A View Askew T-Shirt Extravaganza!
  • Have Kev Leave Your Voice Mail Message!

I'm getting a royal ass kicking on battle of the blogs today. I thought the sexy Brazilian's would gather some support and I don't know what's up with the shoutbox . It looks like the site that I have it with is down. All the blogs I know that use them are having issues with it today. If it's not working Monday I'll find a new one. Not the best blogging week in terms of posts, but I've had the best GOTD theme so far. I haven't decided if next week is going to be Swedish blondes or Naughty School Girls, only time will tell. See you Monday, football season begins Sunday!

GOTD: Gisele

What would Brazil week be without the lovely Gisele? One of the best quality weeks ever here at West Texas Rocks.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

The video headstone and facts about Brazilian women.

What is the next technological marvel? The video headstone! The 7-inch shatter-resistant LCD screen is designed to last for 15 years, when it can either be replaced with a newer device or covered with a bronze plaque. It will come with a one-year warranty; extended coverage for 10 years is about another $200. Now people can watch me doing your mom, long after you shot me in the back.

That's it. It is an extremely slow news day or at least the mindless news that I post.

Tomorrow is the last of the Brazilian women. I know I'm sad too, but there are other girls to see and one day we will make it make it back to the bountiful beauty that is Brazil. Here are few things I learned about Brazilian women this week. It must be true if I found it on the internet(s).
An American woman has several fundamental problems that will never go away and that will get much worse a few years after she is married:

  • Her inherent anti-male bias and pre-occupation with fairness that was drilled into her at high school, college, and through the media. Her constant confrontations and trying to prove herself and to make a point.
  • Her self-centeredness, her ridiculously high expectations, her sense of entitlement, her high-maintenance, superficial, and stuck up attitude, her snootiness and her sense of superiority. This "princess" syndrome means that she will always think that she is better than you, and that she deserves and she is entitled to whatever she wants from you.
  • Her general mental instability and psychological disorders.
  • Her using sex as a weapon and reward to get things.
  • Brazilian women generally don't have any of these problems. Marrying an American woman simply does not make sense. The ONLY reason men stay with American women is because they did not have enough exposure to Brazilian women. Any man who spent a few months in Brazil will not even look at American women again.

This info was found at a Brazilian mail order bride site, and you thought it was only Russians. I may start taking donations.

GOTD: Ana Beatriz Barro

Ana Beatriz Barro