Thursday, June 30, 2005
What the world needs now,
Is Crackheads, sweet Crackheads,
It's the only thing that there's just too little of.
What the world needs now,
Is Crackheads, sweet Crackheads,
No, not just for some but for everyone.
I’ve got nothing.
Strange News / Celebrity Crap:
Beach volleyball gives women saggy boobs. STOP THE MADNESS! A top plastic surgeon Dr George Khoury, 39, from Hamburg, says the increasingly popular sport has created a growing number of female clients who have come to him complaining about sagging breasts. He warns that while the physical exertion might be good for the rest of the body, all the jumping and diving involved in beach volleyball puts a strain on women's breasts. Vigorous movements and vibrations stretch the tissue around the breasts, which can lead to permanent sagginess, warned Dr Khoury. NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! He then added: "The female breasts, even small ones, were not made for swinging up and down 300 times within a short period of time, as happens in beach volleyball." DAMN YOU BEACH VOLLEYBALL!!! If you need some support for this critical issue please let us know in the shout box and someone can be found to help you, even if I personally have to take matters into my own hands!
A 646.2-pound (293 kg) Mekong giant catfish, netted in Thailand, may be the largest freshwater fish ever found. The wife of the fisherman had this to say. I am not cleaning that big son-of-a-bitch and if you think I am going to make enough coleslaw and fries for it your out of your fucking mind!
New Dad thinks his son might be gay.
Maybe bling has gone too far
War of the Worlds, anyone?
Here is usually where I would give a review about Beauty and the Geek. I am not going to be doing that today because it was not that good. Scarlet and Sean loss and were kicked out and Scarlet was a stuck up bitch about it.
Big Brother 6 is going to start pretty soon here is the lowdown. Each contestant will have a pre-existing relationship with one other roommate. However, they will be instructed to keep their alliance secret because they'll be under the assumption that everyone else in the house doesn't know each other.
Girl of the Day:
I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar. - Dogma
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
I found this little article on Blender it talks about the crazy ass club scene where the patron bring along uzis and help the DJ out by shooting into the air when he calls for them to. Along with shooting in the air I imagine several caps are busted of in people asses. Ohh, and people are being shot too.
Strange News / Celebrity Crap:
My favorite live rocker, Kid Rock is being sued by a DJ over an assault in a strip club in downtown Nashville, Tennessee. Hell yeah, if I were rich you would only find me in a strip club. Disc Jockey Jerry Campos filed a lawsuit claiming that Rock punched him at Christies Cabaret in February after a dispute. Kid Rock was arrested and charged with assault, but was later released on a $3,000 bond. Campos is seeking $500,000 in punitive damages and $75,000 in compensation. Since when does getting punched in the face make you fucking rich. These fuckers need to stop being such pussies if a celebrity chunked a phone at me or punched me in the face I would kick their ass. If I loss then I would just take the loss like a man.
I knew Disney was making a sequel to Pirates of the Caribbean, but it looks like they will be making a third also. Johnny Depp made this flick worthwhile, and he will return as Captain Jack Sparrow. Here is the plot outline from IMDB.
This time around, Johnny returns as Captain Jack Sparrow and is caught in yet another tangled web of supernatural intrigue. It turns out, Captain Jack owes a blood debt to the legendary Davey Jones, ruler of the ocean depths and captain of the ghostly Flying Dutchman. If Jack can't figure a crafty way out of this one, he'll be cursed to an afterlife of eternal servitude and damnation. And as if that weren't enough, Captain Jack's problems throw a huge wrench into the wedding plans of the blissful Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann, who quickly find themselves thrust into Jack's misadventures.
Underworld is also going to have a sequel. All the original actors are returning. You cannot go wrong with Kate Bekinsale in leather.
Beauty and the Geek comes on tonight. One of the geeks has his own blog.
Girl of the Day:
I've learned that you can't treat every situation as a life-and-death matter because you'll die a lot of times. Write that down. Van Wilder
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Check out these lyrics to First by Lindsay Lohan on the Herbie: Fully Loaded movie.
Cuz when I see you something inside me burns
And then I realize
I wanna cum first
I wanna cum first
Well if you insist! I hear a lot of chatting on the net about Lohan being too skinny. It’s like my daddy always says: The closer the bone the sweeter the meat! Seriously though she needs to eat burger or something. Maybe she can call up Paris Hilton and they can go visit Carl Jr. together.
In other music news I noticed you can download the latest single Guarded by Disturbed at the iTunes music store.
Strange News / Celebrity Crap:
Avril Levigne got engaged to front man of Sum 41 Deryck Whibley. Now they can be angry together. I wonder what would happen if this made them happy though. I mean both of this people have mad crap loads of money on being misunderstood, angry teens. Now they are growing up and are getting married. I guess they can start singing about how changing diapers suck.
I said no teeth, you vampire looking byatch!
War of the Worlds starts this weekend. I will probably not watch it, but if you watch it let me know what your think.
The challenges on Hells Kitchen were not that great but the ending was. The red team lost and Chef Ramsay let Michael, the crazy tattooed guy, pick the two losers. Instead of taking out the weakest, Jimmy, he decided to nominate his toughest competition Chris and Elsie. Early in the show Chris told everyone he was the strongest contestant and Michael called him on it and nominated him. Chris has being getting on the Chef Ramsay nerves for awhile claiming he was the best and Chef took his jacket and left Elsie standing in shock and Michael with a huge shit eating grin on his face.
I saw that Average Joes is starting tonight I will not be watching this crap as I think dating shows are bullshit, but I thought I would at least say it started.
Girl of the Day:
Jennifer Garner is the girl of the day because she can look sweet and naive and then turn around and look like she is going to kick your ass.
Joe, I've had new neighbors before but none of them were half the man you are. And since you're half a man already, that splits them into some kind of fraction I can't even measure. - Peter Griffin Family Guy
Monday, June 27, 2005
I heard a rumor this weekend Disturbed is going to be in Amarillo. It was probably true because it was just confirmed that they will be in Lubbock on August 20 with Dark New Day, the band that sings Brother. I'm not sure when tickets go on sale, but when I know so do you. I will also try and post a GOTD later.
10 Years: This is a good young band I think we will see more of. They had a lot of energy and good songs and just seemed happy to be playing. I really liked Wasteland it had a really good energy and got the crowd going. You can check it out at their website. http://www.10yearsmusic.com/
Bo Jones: Man this band sucked. I mean man they were really bad, horrible, disastrous, whatever word you want to use. As some of you know my pure disdain for Napoleon Dynamite this fucker looked just like him and you tell he was a totally poser. He was wearing on of those socialist shirts and then talking about Jesus and he looked all of 16. I knew it was going to bad but then they started to set up a keyboard and I was positive it was going to be a suckfest. It was worse then I thought and then he stated dancing! How do I describe his dancing? Picture a spider monkey waving his hands over is head and spinning in slow circles, I think that comes close.
Blood Simple: This band came out and had a lot of energy thanked the crowd for coming out to check out the early bands in this hot weather and then preceded to rock out hardcore. This band is pure metal and it was good to hear some really good metal for a change.
At this point I look down and see I am starting to burn. So we decide to go into the pavilion and rest between acts. My friend Ed who had been drinking pretty much this whole day was starting to get buzzed. This looked like a good idea, but who could I con into being the designated driver?
American Head Charge: We stayed in the pavilion for this band as we had all seen them live a few times and I personally was not that impressed.
During this time Crazy Dan snapped off his beer bracelet saying it was bothering the hell out of him. I saw this as an opportunity and asked if he would be the designated driver since he did not want to wear the band. He reluctantly agreed and it was time for a visit to the bar. I got me a double shot of Jack Daniels and was off. I sat backed down and bullshited with everybody while me and Ed checked out all the hot chicks walking around. I hit the bar again for another double shot and it was time for the next band.
Prom Kings: Again not feeling it was quite time to enter the pit we walked around and found a spot on the lawn. Next to us were a couple of Aryans or Nazi we came to find out. We found this out when one of them stood up and had White and Power tattooed to his calves. Idiots! His other friends with him had various other tattoos such as iron crosses and skulls, but the strangest thing was on in the group had a hispanic girlfriend. I thought this was breaking the white supremacist rules or something, but whatever. I liked the Prom Kings they had a lot of energy and really worked the crowd. When their CD comes out it is definitely on the list to buy.
Then it was time to head back to the pavilion for another double shot of Jack.
No Address: It was now time for the pit as we headed to the stage. I listen to a couple of songs and they played their one half decent song Down midway through I decided it was enough of these guys. I did not think they were too good, but Crazy Dan stayed out there and enjoyed it.
Maybe it was the sunburn, maybe it was a hot blond chick I spotted in the pavilion, either way it was time to head back to the bar for another double shot of Jack Daniels.
Back in the pavilion me and Ed spotted a another really hot blond girl with a really big friend in a Nirvana shirt. When I say really big I mean a 6 foot 300 pound behemoth. I tried to convince Ed of the finer point of being a wingman, but he was having none of this being 5 foot 7 and 150 pounds. I don’t know if he could have handled her anyway, but damn it he could have tried. This banter went on for about twenty minutes when Crazy Dan and his came back in. Crazy Dan then got into the conversation for another 10 or minutes when it was time for another double shot and back to the stage. We were all looking forward to Static X.
Static-X: When we get out there the crowd had already started to grow large. I guess people were starting to come in as the crowd had been pretty small until now. At first we were pretty far back but I saw a pit starting to form and nodded to Ed to follow me. I made my way through 5 or 6 people to get to the pit and walked straight thru it to damn near the front of the stage. I never got touched, but had to push a couple of the crazy tattooed shirtless fuckers out of the way. When I looked back Ed was nowhere to be seen. Never hesitate! At this point I should once again note my size as I am a 6 foot 5, 300 pound behemoth. Now you are asking yourself why I did not I become the wingman. All I have to say is principle, my friend, principle. Anyway, Ed had eventually got out of the pit to the front and I saw him about 5 minutes later. We stayed on the outside ring of the pit and pushed the crazy fuckers back in or helped them up when they fell. Static X was really cool and are much better live then on the radio. They played a few of their new songs from their latest CD Start a War and some older songs like Cold.
It was time to head back into the pavilion for another double shot of Jack and some rest.
Powerman 5000: I had seen this band live once before at Summer Sanitarium in 2001 in Dallas and it was a crazy experience. I was up in the seats and some people ripped off the cushions of their seats and start throwing them down. Powerman saw this and encouraged everyone to do the same. Next thing you know 30,000 seat cushions are being thrown at it looks like Christmas. So I knew these guys put on a good show and was not disappointed. Crazy Dan and Ed found sides on one side on the pit and I went on the opposite site and tried to push people over to them it was a great show Powerman rules live. On their last song they asked if any Texas girls would like to come up on stage and help them out. Next thing you know there are like 50 girls up on stage. They played when Worlds Collide I am not sure how some of these girls were able to dance so nasty to this song, but being the real troopers they are they found a way. Especially these two blond girls one in a black shirt that said sporty and a other in a yellow shirt, they were very hot and the girl in the yellow shirt flashed the crowd along with several others.
It was to the pavilion and after I got myself another double shot of Jack Daniels I saw that chick in the yellow shirt in the line at the bar and thought this might be cool to talk to her. Granted I am about as smooth as cheap whiskey, but I thought what the hell. I went up to her and said Thank you. I am not sure if it was Wayne’s World or those Thank You Twix commercials where I came up with that. Maybe it was just my polite manners, maybe I could not think of anything else, or maybe I was just starting to feel a little buzz. Whatever it was it worked. I ended up buying her a beer and we got to talking then she gave me a nice blowjob. Sorry that last part did not happen, but if it did it would have been bad ass. Anyway, right after I said thank you, apparently she had a kid. When he ran up to her saying mommy I knew it was time to make my exit. I milled around for about 15 minutes, before I went back for another double shot and by this time you could say I had a pretty good buzz going.
Crossfade: I am not a huge fan of Cross fade, anyway, but everyone in our little group agreed they sucked live. Seeing how walking straight was starting to get difficult I did not go to the stage for this one but snuck some chairs out from the pavilion into the lawn and had a seat.
After Crossfade I went back to get one more double shot of Jack Daniels and waited for Seether.
Seether: It was pretty crowded down by the stage during Seether. So I knew the pit would be pretty much nonexistent and seeing how standing seemed to be turning into a small challenge I just found my chair up on the lawn and enjoyed a good set by a good band. Seether is probably the closest thing to Nirvana today and I really like their music. They played a really good show. And during the encore Amy Lee came out and sang Broken which was cool because you were not expecting it.
After the concert I thought IHOP sounded like a good idea, but was over ruled and we just went back home.
As I sit typing this out today I cannot help but notice my red sunburnt arm. The only white place on it is where my beer band was.
Friday, June 24, 2005
X-Fest 2 is tomorrow.
Doors Open at 2pm
American Head Charge
Strange News / Celebrity Crap:
Just what we needed Celebrity Idol. It is going to labeled as a spin off of American Idol but with celebrities read has-beens. They team that created American Idol is also trying to get the same judge Simon, Randy and Paula. Since the show is just now being pitched I would like to add some ideas. Since the celebrity is going to be on TV and probably has no right being there, but only making a dick of there selves the audience should be givin dildos to throw at these crappy ass stars. I mean what better says YOU SUCK then being hit with a dildo in the face.
Wimbledon referee Alan Mills is trying to ban noise pollution at Wimbledon. He says the girls grunting is to loud and should stop as it is giving the sport a bad name. What the hell are you talking about Alan that is won of the best things about Wimbledon is watching these athletic hot women in short skirts grunting. Nothing says I want to win like ARRRGHHHH.
Nicholas Cage will star as Ghost Rider and here is the first promotional poster.
Thursday television watching sucks in the summer no survivor, no new episodes CSI. I have started seeing commercials for the new fall shows I have not seen anything that is going to make it though. I saw a preview for a new show with Jason Lee in it. It looks like it could be worth a few laughs. Those of you who don’t know Jason Lee he is the actor that was in Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Stealing Harvard, and A Guy Thing.
Girl of the Day:
I will be rocking out tomorrow at X-fest and will not be posting a blog so the babe of the day and weekend will be The Mistress of Metal, Juliya.
"Sometimes you just have to rock out, with your cock out" -Anonymous
Thursday, June 23, 2005
If one day I add a female to the team they can feel free to post anything they wish except no penises you have to draw the line somewhere.
2 days to X Fest 2!
Strange News / Celebrity Crap:
Can Jessica Simpson be stopped? I am not sure but God Bless America!
So I found me a new mouse pad today. Check it out!
Here is a two second trailer for the next King Kong Movie.
Beauty and the Geek was hilarious, it was the best one yet. The beauties had to learn math and the geeks had to get digits. The geeks were able to go on a practice date with the beauties, but the catch was they had to ask them. So you are saying, how is that a catch, but you have to remember most of these nerdy bastards have never asked a girl out. Richard the geekest fucker I have ever seen used the worst pickup line I have ever heard. He would take a beauty on a couch and say I feel a little ill. The beauty would then say something like why or really and then he would come back with Yes, I am about to ask you out on a date. After he asked three beauties and got shout down as they already had dates it turns out that Lauren one of the hottest ended up the loser and had to go. I say one of the hottest because I cannot decide between her and the big breasted beer spokes model Scarlet. Some of these geeks did OK on their dates, but some were bad. Take Chuck and Scarlet the conversation he tried to direct you have got to ask yourself why? I mean really who talks about the Quaker faith besides Quakers? One was a disaster and not in a funny way but in a will someone just beat him! Richard and the stunningly hot Lauren was not only a disaster at times it was hard to watch. I know she could have beat the shit out of him and that would have been fun to watch. In the pre-date interview Richard thought he had a 120 percent to score, instead he had 120 percent chance to look like a douche bag on TV. The beauties challenge was to go shopping for the geeks. They had a thousand dollars to spend and had to add up the clothes they bought plus the sales tax. Lauren won, but it was not that good because it did not show how far of they were off or what the others said the total was. The beauties then gave their geek a makeover and it was time to get some digits. Chuck being the cocksucker that he is came up with a cheap ass way to win by telling women he was a gay screenwriter and if they wanted to help him with a movie. Richard asked everyone for a number including middle aged and elderly women and still getting last. In the elimination round Richards team beat out Laurens team and the hot Lauren was forced to leave the house.
Girl of the Day:
This girl started as a webcam girl who started making her rounds on the internet and my block. Then Howard Stern said she had the best ass in the world and she exploded, along with millions of guys pants. I cannot disagree with Mr. Stern though it is one hot ass. Some even claim she has a face but I have yet to make my way that far up. So here is Keyra from Argentina:
Conservatives saw the savagery of 9/11 in the attacks and prepared for war; liberals saw the savagery of the 9/11 attacks and wanted to prepare indictments and offer therapy and understanding for our attackers.
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
X-Fest 2 in 3 days. Doors open at 2pm shows ends at probably 1am. Now begins the quest for a designated driver.
Strange News / Celebrity Crap:
A great mother was indicted instead of applauded for hiring a stripper for his 16 birthday. What guy does not want a stripper for his birthday? His mom being the loving matriarch of her family did what we have always hoped would happen and paid for a stripper to dance at his birthday party. He was 16 what do you want her to hire a clown?
Here is a link to the article.
Here is a link to show your support for our higher class citizens.
The summer has started and in Texas that means BBQ, Beer, Music, and Sheep Fucking. I would like to stress to our redneck friends that BAAAAA mean NO!
We here at West Texas Rocks brought you the breaking story of Disney digitally reducing the breasts of Lindsay Lohan for Herbie. Then uncovered some boob alteration on Angelina Jolie in her movie Mr. and Mrs. Smith have now found new evidence of another cover up. On the popular TV show Desperate Housewives, ABC has spent thousands of dollars digitally covering up Terri Hatchers nipples. No wonder this beautiful woman has low self esteem and worries about her body. Hatcher has said on many occasions that she will not wear a bikini for fear someone will that her ass is and I quote droopy. This is appalling and the people at ABC and Disney who owns ABC should be ashamed. Just how far will Disney go to suppress women I have no idea, but do not fear we will do our best to spread this news and uncover this conspiracy.
This weekend Bewitched comes out. I like Will Farrell and Nicole Kidman is hot but together seems a little unbelievable to me. I know what you are thinking it is about a witch you does magic will that’s more believable then watching Farrell and Kidman kiss. Think about it!
Nothing was on last night if you get the WB check out Beauty and The Geek. I watched a clip for the show tonight and it looks like the biggest geek I have ever seen starts asking all the beauties out. Will this geek get a day without having to pay for it?
Girl of the Day:
So I was surfing around last night and what did I find but Winnie Cooper from the Wonder Years half naked! My reaction was Holy Shit that girl from the Wonder Years grew up! So I proudly present Danica McKellar
""A guy walks up to me and asks 'What's Punk?'. So I kick over a garbage can and say 'That's punk!'. So he kicks over a garbage can and says 'That's Punk?', and I say 'No that's trendy!""
- Billie Joe Armstrong (Green Day)
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Just waiting for X Fest 2 it is this Saturday!
News / Celebrity Crap:
MMMMMMMM Chronic Candy. Follow this link to read about the marijuana-inspired candy. Check out the links below to see it. Why? That is a question I cannot answer. The question you should ask is: What will those crazy potheads think of next?
Crazy Dan and I got into an argument about Batman Begins as he liked the Rachel character and I thought she was useless bullshit. We did, however, agree that Joey Potter cannot act!
Hells Kitchen is not as fun when Chef Ramsay is not ripping the contestants. The restraint actually got meals this episode as the Red team overcame the blue team. Carl Ann was kicked off for not being interesting and that is pretty much it.
I have added a new link to the link page. TVGASM it is quite entertaining and has episode reviews or guides to popular shows . http://www.tvgasm.com/
Girl of the Day:
I have got a lot of feedback at least when I post hot girls. Go figure right. So I decided to add a girl of the day to my regular posting. Who should it be though? I have posted links for Jessica Simpson or Daisy Duke if you like and posted a link for Paris Hilton in others blogs. After careful consideration I thought it needed to be someone that is not really known here in the states, someone unique. Someone.... With large breasts! So I present Keeley of British Page 3 fame.
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and I will give ya something to cry about you little bastard! - The Great White Hype
Monday, June 20, 2005
Foo Fighters. In Your Honor is a two disc Album with Disc one being a good alternative or rock CD, while the second is acoustic. Where generally a 2 cd is pure crap just put in to make you spend more money. This is not the case with the Foo fighters the 2 cd is just as good or better then the first and I would have bought it separately if I had to. I really like the tracks Best of You and Resolve on disc 1 and on Disc to there are several good tracks and I do not want to signal out one or two. This set truly proves the talent of Dave Grohl from going to hard physical music to beautiful and emotional melody.
Gorillaz. I thought the previous work was better, but I really like Feel Good Inc. I would just purchase the single most of the songs on the CD just does not work it almost feels they were rushed in making this.
Lubbock Gunslingers won their last game home game. What a game it was! 62 to 60. It was and up and done affair with Gunslingers pulling it out with a missed field goal. The Gunslinger won the toss but elected to defer where the River City Rage chose to receive. The Gunslingers Defense held tough and Marc Saldana hit Carlos Heard for his first of 6 touchdowns. The rest of the game was back and forth until the beginning of the third quarter and Lubbock took an 11 point lead. With an opportunity to put a real nail in the coffin The Gunslinger were unable to capitalize and fell to score within the ten. On the next offensive series Saldana through what should have been a touchdown but was called back by the cock sucking refs because one of the linemen was supposedly to far down the field. The Rage took this opportunity to take a 1 point lead. With 2:45 seconds left in the Game Lubbock methodically took it down the field and Tate kicked an 12 yard field goal to take the lead by 2 with 4.6 seconds left. The gunslingers had been kicking the ball low and bouncing it off the ground the entire second half for fear of returns, which had happen once and almost a second time in the first half. This time something when wrong and they hit a player close and he was able to recover the ball with good field possession. Lubbock burned the rest of their timeouts and then River City shanked it right and the Gunslingers pulled of their second home game win. One of the causes of the Gunslinger win was just the out and out trash talk are players dish out. They may not be the best team, but if you got points for cheap shots and trash talk then they would be unstoppable. My player of the year goes to number 9 Devin Rispress the Gunslingers running back, for being fast on his feet as well as his mouth. Thanks for the entertainment Devin, I hope to see you next year!
Batman Begins is the best Batman movie to date. Although this movie still broke one of my cardinal rules and the love interest found out who the hero was. I do not understand why Batman has to have a love interest anyway it really does not make much since when compared to the mythology. Batman Begins did an excellent job of humanizing the character with more emphasis on the story then is usually found in comic based movies. I like the fact that this movie was more based in stunts then special effects. Christen Bale also made the best batman/Bruce Wayne and here is why.
- Michael Keaton. Although good as Batman he made a terrible Bruce Wayne. Bruse Wayne is supposed to be a pimp or playboy whatever you want to call he scores all the time with supermodels. Michael Keaton is unbelievable in this role.
- Vale Kilmer. Ok I can buy him as Bruce Wayne, personally he looks like a moron but ok I will give the ladies this, But come on do you really think he can kick your ass. NO.
- George Clooney. You would think he would make a good Batman I know he can play dark brooding evil, Dusk till Dawn, but he just does not. I am not sure if it him or if it was the script or director. I’m going to give him a break since the movie was crap and blame everyone else on that piece of shit.
- Christen Bale. Great choice because we know he can play duel roles because of American Psycho. So he wins because Chicks dig him and he pulled off a good job as the fledgling caped crusader.
House of Flying Daggers. This movie had visually stunning action sequences and a great story with good twist. It was a very good movie.
Hells Kitchen tonight.
Some guy raped a dog. http://www.fox21.com/Global/story.asp?S=3456745
They told me there was nothing out there, nothing to fear. But the night my parents were murdered I caught a glimpse of something. I have looked for it ever since. I went around the world, searched in all the shadows. And there is something out there in the darkness, something terrifying, something that will not stop until it gets revenge.........Me.
Friday, June 17, 2005
Today I will continue with my regular blog format. Do not worry I will keep you
posted on the Disney debacle.
Now much going on, I missed the Theory of a Deadman concert. Lately I have
just been listening to the new album Karma and Effect from Seether. It is a
really good CD you should defiantly buy it.
News / Celebrity Crap:
I have done many hours of searching on the breast reeducation that Disney
has given Lindsay Lohan. Everything is pretty much the same and the celebrity
media seems to find nothing wrong with this. In fact Lohan is ok with it. I
find it disturbing though and it makes me question just what kind society are
we leaving in when a big beautiful breasts are scorned and ridiculed. It is
disgraceful! This scandal is not just on one actress. I also read a report
that Angilina Jolie also had this kind of treatment in her newest movie Mr.
and Mrs. Smith. Apparently when she was sliding down a pole a boob was bouncing
around. Well guess what that are what boobs do, but then again the computer
digital geeks show no backbone and flattened it up. Now I like Sci-Fi and fantasy
as much as the next guy, but let us not get to carried away. As a society are
we saying Hey breast are great as long as they are not to big and do not move.
Katie Holmes decided to marry her father today! I meant Tom Cruise sorry.
With this news I have decided to do an investigative series on dangerous cults,
Scientology and the Free Masons. More information coming soon!
Do you need your own mini me but just for a few hours because you really do not
want the responsibility of having to feed and clean up after it?
I received a request to link to Paric Hiltons Carls Jr. Commercial.
Ultra Sexy Version
Also here are some wallpapers I have made. Just click the picture link the
right click the big picture and set as wallpaper. Enjoy!
Batman Begins ummm, began this week.
Beauty and the Geek: I meant to write this yesterday and got distracted. This
was the second time I watched this show and it was funny as last weeks. Granted
most of the beauties are still complete idiots, although I have noticed one
or two of them might not be totally brain dead. They had to learn about rocket
science whish was a lost cause, well for most of them anyway. The geeks however
are still absolute geeks with no signs of change. This week they had to pick
out fashionable clothes for their hot ladies. In the swimsuit section not on
picked out a thong. Very disappointing nerds! I think the geeks did a worse
job learning about fashion then the hotties did about rocket science.
The best thing about the show this week was I watched it with my dad whose
endless smart ass jokes about the show he did not want to watch were funnier
then the actual show. I wish I could remember them!
Here are a few pictures of Lauren apparently she was in the lingerie bowl.
If anyone else knows when to get some pictures of the beautys let me
I am going to leave with a quote form my pops which I always thought
I would not kick her out of bed unless it was to fuck her on the
Yeah, my pops is a true man of words.
Thursday, June 16, 2005
OUTRAGE AT DISNEY!
Disney has taken a perfectly natural and beautiful occurrence and cheapened it. Supposedly in a test screening of Herbie: Fully Loaded many parents and kids thought the breasts of Lindsay Lohan were too voluptuous to star in a family movie. I really do not think they talked to the boys are men in this test screening; because a male no matter what the age would never utter a fictitious observation such as this. I truly cannot understand the jealousy some women have for others who, whether they are natural or enhanced, have large breasts. Instead of ignoring this atrocious complaint Disney decided to have its digital computer artists reduce the size of her breasts. How my brother geeks could do this I will never understand I would have refused and made them fire me for this odious request. I think I am more upset with my computer brethren then Disney. I cannot express the disappoint I have in heart with words. Below is a link to the article where I learned of this heartbreaking crime.
Below is a comparison, true and digitally remastered.
I believe this is a cause for West Texas Rock to take up. More information will be uncovered in the weeks to come.
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Have you seen the new Jessica Simpson Dukes of Hazzard video? Click Here! What the hell are you waiting for? I know the quality is bad but it is the only video I could find.
While you are at it check out Shakira new video La Tartura too. It makes me want to learn Spanish. Of course most of her videos are that way.
News / Celebrity Crap:
Link to my DVD collection page is 8 is still not reviewed but this will work for now.
I am easily entertained so if I put a movie really low you know it is bad. I rate most movie 3 which means Average to me. So a 2 and hafl and 3 and a half is just above average. A 4 means this was really good and a 5 means a personal favorite.
While I was channel surfing last night I came across a show Hit Me Baby One More Time it is about old one-hit wonder bands trying to make a come back. Sure this show has crap written all over it, but could they at least have found a better host? I am not sure what is more pathetic the cheesy ass British host or the has-beens.
One time my cousin Walter got this cat stuck in his ass. True story. He bought it at the local mall, so the whole fiasco wound up on the news. It was embarrassing for my relatives and all. But the next week, he did it again. Different cat, same results, complete with a trip to the emergency room. Then, last week, I saw him in the pet store. He was buying another cat. I said, Walt, what the hell are you doing, you know you're just gonna get this cat stuck up your ass too, why don't you knock it off?" And he says to me, "Brodie, how the hell else am I supposed to get the gerbil out?" My cousin was a weird guy.
-- Brodie, Mallrats
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Nothing happening at the moment!
News / Celebrity Crap:
So Wacko Jacko was found innocent, big deal like I did not see that one. Who would let their kid stay with that freak, anyway, he does not even look human. He looks like some mutant I used to read about in the X-Men comic book. The funny part is now he is saying he want to revitalize his career. That has to be a joke he is a total has-been and needs to face the facts. I mean seriously do want to listen to the crap he will try and push off on you. Maybe, he will change is style and sing classic children songs. That way he can lower the age of his groupies.
In other shocking news Katie Holmes converted to scientology. Tom Cruise had this to say:
One down, One billion to go! MAUHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Also, Alicia Silverstone got married this weekend. Yes, thank you. The honeymoon was fantastic.
In other news I am half way on rating my DVD collection and will probably post the link tonight or tomorrow. At least that is the goal.
Hells Kitchen: This week Jeff finally had enough of Chef Ramsay and feeble tried to stand up to him. In what way did you do this? Did he go off in a cursing storm or rant? No, he called him an asshole. Like Ramsay was not aware of this already. Very pathetic, I mean the Chef has a great 4 letter vocabulary and Jeff only comes up with asshole? Jeff then sulked of the show as he should after a pathetic come back like that. Chef Ramsay just laughed at his attempt to be a man. The next chef to go was the vegetarian Asian chick. Why did they put her on meats? Who wants a vegetarian chef anyway? I want my steak bloody! Hopefully, next week Chef Ramsay will shove his foot up Andrew ass.
Nothing is on tonight, but Beauty and the geek comes on Wednesday and it is worth another watch it was quite funny watching those nerds and bimbos last week. Those hotties idiots!
There is nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
- -Randall from Clerks
Monday, June 13, 2005
So my NIFL Arena team finally won a home game. Go, Gunslingers! After all the sad defeats they not only win their first home game, they kicked the living shit out of the Lincoln capitols. It was like 88 to 30 or something. The team started a new quarterback this game and it was about time. The team was not talentless the quarterback was just afraid of his shadow and like to go down on a slight breeze. The sad part was nobody was there to see this team pull themselves up. Support has long since gone after the bankruptcy and then the constant losses were not able to get buzz going. I would be surprised if they are still around next year, but I hope so. Either way there is one more game left. I plan to be there even if I am the only one!
I bought the new CD from Weezer this weekend not very impressed so far, but I am not a big fan. I liked Beverly Hills and We Are All on Drugs that is about it. I will review the Foo Fighters CD when it comes out.
Bought a few and watched a few DVDs this weekend. I bought Assault on Precinct 13, House of Flying Daggers, and The Postman. The Postman I got because it was cheap and I liked this movie even if the critics slammed it. I like Assault on Precinct 13 it was as good as I hoped it would be coming from the maker of Training Day which is a personal favorite, but it was good and it had a few surprises. I also watched The Boogeyman and I thought it started out really good but he had a really crappy ending. It left a lot of loose ends. The entire you were waiting for that one moment for it to really scare you and it never comes. Sort of disappointing, but I thought the main actor did a good job in it.
I found a web site that allows you to keep track of your DVDs write reviews for them share your thoughts with your friends. I did this for several hours this weekend, but I still like adding several DVDs and I have not even started writing reviews. Soon as I get everything updated I will post a link and you can check out my collection.
Hells Kitchen comes on tonight. I like that Scottish bastard Chef Gordon Ramsey. I watched his English show on BBC this weekend it was brilliant.
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
So I finally watch that Naploen Dynamite movie. What a piece of shit that was! You see clips of that crap everywhere and everyone on the TV and radio are like it was hilarious. I even had a few friends say it was good. Of course, I should have listened to my brothers who told me it sucked and it was a colossal waste of time, but no I had to see for myself. Friends do not let friends watch this crap. Everyone in this movie or help make this movie deserves to get their ass kicked that also includes anyone who recommended this movie.
So how many people wanna kick some ass?
Monday, June 06, 2005
Just remember: You must feel the force around you, then clear the answer will become.
Thursday, June 02, 2005
"My mom and dad weren't perfect
But still you don't hear no cryin' ass bitchin' from me
Like there seems to be on everybody's CD"
There needs to be more music like that.
On the movie front I went watched Longest Yard this weekend with Adam Sandler. The movie was funny and I laughed in the theater, but afterwards couldn't remember a damn thing. So it was enjoyable but forgettable. Of course I'm a huge nerd and thus have seen Star Wars multiple times already. It was a great movie the best Star Wars in my opinion by far and the rest of the summer movies are going to have a hard time topping it.
So that was a decent first post. Till next time. Just remember "You're Good Enough, Your smart enough, and dog gone it people like you!"